Filthy Shades Of Grey

Before I say anything about this book, I’ll say that I’m merely giving you all what I think.

I first heard about it on the news: “Wordplay is the new foreplay it seems, in this new novel, Fifty Shades of Grey by author E.L. James that is causing quite a stir among..” I was sitting down with my mum at the time. The atmosphere seemed to double in pressure and the awkwardness went sky-high. My first impressions were:

  • Seriously, a book about Sex?
  • Why? Urm, I mean porn is already there for people if they’re into that sort of thing.
  • So I’m sure it’s not selling well because if people already utilize Porn sites, they won’t even think twice of reading about sex. Will they?
  • What?

So naturally everywhere online it seems people are posting pictures and statuses describing how they’re reading 50 Shades of Grey. Their excuse for buying it? The most socially acceptable legit reason possible folks: “Oh well everyone was making a fuss about it and out of curiosity I just wanted to know what the big deal was!” Yeah *snorts* I bet you’ve all found out now eh. I am not going to lie here; the only reason I started reading this book was to see whether it was actually as gross, graphic, and ‘pornified’ as it sounded. I don’t even know how many chapters I was into this book but let’s just say I got to the graphic part which I managed to read. My impression: “Okay, so I know now why everyone is reading this” But I got to the point where I could not sit and read it any longer. It was just ugh.

“Ughh.” Not because of the graphic imagery or content. “Ughh.” because of Christian Grey. Initially, he sounded like a dream. That mysterious guy whose presence is enough to send sparks flying, hearts racing, and who makes you love being in love. Every reader attracted to Christian Grey overlooked his arrogance because that’s what made him sexy. His sharp dress sense, business empire, dazzling smile, and oh-so-charming looks and behavior. The way he walks, the way he talks. Every aspect combined in one picturesque package, that is, Christian Grey. By this point in the story, dominance isn’t an issue. Control isn’t an issue. Grey is nowhere near an issue. Grey is perfect.

Then he reveals his contract; his motives, his real intentions for Ana. Yes, I know: Anastasia gives consent to do it all. Yes: he isn’t forcing her to please him. And yes: she frigging wants to have sex with him. But all this submissiveness to a person? It’s not healthy. It’s not dignifying. It can be akin to one’s human rights being taken away. I felt for Ana. Yeah alright it was her choice, but once pen touches paper, it’s an irreversible reaction. She may have loved sex with Grey, but it was all for his benefit and none left for her. What if she wants to back out? What if she has an epiphany, snaps back into reality and realizes that she too is human. Or worse- what if she loves him? Humans want relationships because humans are built with emotions damn-it! Humans need to be satisfied mentally as well and I don’t think we’re going to evolve into sex robots whose machines go into overdrive any time soon -.- *Sigh*

This is why I despise Grey so much. A little bit of danger leads to excitement, but Grey is not excitement. Christian Grey is an insanely good-looking, overly-dominant, human rights killer that wouldn’t give a single one of his gloriously soft, tousled hair strands to give up his selfish desires to ensure the welfare of the woman he is ‘making love’ to. And let’s face it, I don’t think  the “Red Room of Pain” has an emergency exit.

On another note. How on earth are they going to produce a film from this novel? O.o

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